Elivs & Adam

Elvis, Elvis, Elvis – I am not going to lie, sometimes I don’t get it…..yeah he was all hip shaking and cutting edge, but someone would have done it eventually he just did it first. I don’t get the women fainting at his feet and I don’t necessarily get his songs and lyrics, but then again I didn’t grow up around that time and probably don’t understand how great it was to get out from under the du-ops of that era……. So was I interested a whole lot last night? Not so much. I did however stay entertained by one sloppy intoxicated Ryan Seacrest. Did anyone else think he had a few under his belt last night? I did. He was all over the board, stating things like “wasup” “that would suck” to a 90 year old woman, getting all giddy with his mom, randomly slow dancing with an audience member, I am just saying he was feellliinnnggg gooooddd last night.

Adam Lambert – well honestly I was a bit perturbed when I heard he is the mentor….I mean does he get to be a mentor yet? He has only been flapping that large thick frog tongue for less than a year. How about one Kelly Clarkston or Carrie Underwood – someone that has had chart topping hit after chart topping hit and could have something to say. But then he started going and giving his advice and I totally agreed with him and appreciated his honesty when he would flat out tell people that they sucked! Thank you Adam, they need to hear it, I appreciate you not blowing smoke up their asses, even if you wanted to with your whole being (literally!) I remembered why I “semi” liked him last season and would have probably hopped on board 100% if he wasn’t in direct competition with my perfect teeth, awesome smile boyfriend Kris Allen. Okay enough of this drag queen and his young Einstein hair …let’s get on with it….

Crystal – I have to tell you I am a bit sick of her wood jewelry, her voice great, fantastic even, but the wood jewelry please let it go……I have bad memories of my teachers wearing wooden giraffes and zebras on a knotted bandana and I don’t think it is a trend that should come back full circle, we should stop it where it started in 1979. Another thing that sort of bugs me is her humbleness every time these judges praise her to heaven and back and she stands there and says “thank you” I mean it is polite and all which I appreciate but just once I want to see her be like Hell yeahs I killed that mo fo…..and give a little wooooohhhh shout along with it…..

Andrew – The stylists on this show are really trying to push the man broach hard core. I am not buying into it – it serves no purpose, not that much jewelry does but come on it’s just stupid. – Also stupid his performance – I didn’t like it and beginning to not like him. Sometimes I wish he would get voted off just so I don’t have to see the black framed cut out posters in the audience….the first one, yes, creative, anyone after that borderline annoying.

Tim – Seriously now he decides to get semi good – ugh it takes everything in my being to compliment him on his voice last night, so I will leave it at this ….he didn’t suck. Okay okay I said it but I still would like to see him leave with every fiber of my being. I did enjoy how sassy Adam was with him like it was so obvious he wanted to get all up on that helmet of a hair do and ride it all the way home – Adam said the following to Tim but I sort of heard it like this…….”your cock I wanna suck” “I mean it didn’t suck” “your pretty” “I mean that sounded pretty” WHHOOOPPSSSIEEE…….he was smitten.

Lee – he sang “A little bit more action” – well now isn’t that calling the kettle black? He sounded great but I tell you what the expressionless face is killing me…..It reminds me of Billy Baldwin’s constant I look like I am going to sneeze face. I am just saying act like this is something you want to do for the rest of your life.

Aaron – My gaydar went off the charts with this duo….what do you think? Other than that just dumb, can’t take the youngness of this guy he is too……toddler like and I can’t buy into it.

Siobhan – I think she was showing off for Adam with all the intense face close ups and screaming. She sang suspicious minds and I wasn’t all that impressed, however I am really impressed how many hairstyles this girl can come up with short hair. I am trying to get mine a little longer and all I can come up with is a ponytail?

Mike – Sounded good, no big shakes.

Katie – What was with the tribute to Mr. T last night she had more gold on her than Trump’s ass sits on in a day……ridiculous. I can’t even remember what she sang so it couldn’t have been that good

Casey – fell asleep and not really mad about it.

That is about it. I think Aaron will go home tonight.

Munson out……