Don't Mess with Texas..

So why does Ryan have to be so dramatic with his “cry for help”? I mean starting off the show standing on top of the building, no guard rails no room for error….This is how I read it…. “Simon please come back next year, please please, please don’t make my gravy train end, I mean it ……I will jump……” A bit desperate don’t ya think?

Well let’s start out with Doogie…….I mean who does this guy think he is? Getting through medical school by the age of 12, hosting the Oscars, fooling everyone by playing a straight man on “how I met your mutha”, and now guest judging on AI all in one’s lifetime……it’s down right embarrassing for the rest of us who have not accomplished crap next to this little saucy one. I am still in denial that he likes the snausage, that is right I used to watch Doogie Houser MD with great intent, and yes I wanted to be Wanda his girlfriend, who wouldn’t?? Being a stay at home girlfriend and riding his medical gravy train….think about how many scrunchies I could have purchased with his bank roll……but he does like the snausage except for Simon’s! I liked the battle, I liked his perspective, I liked his anti aging skin, and I like that he stood firm in his jazz hand decisions. I am just saying I might be okay with Simon leaving if the panel could permanently sit Mr. Harris and Ms. Perry.

On the complete flip side of things there is one Joe Jonas…….glad he got the claim as the “cute one” because he might not have a lot upstairs….he didn’t speak one word, seriously a whole day behind the table and not one comment or opinion to what is happening in front of you? His verbal skills are about as lame as his “chastity promise rings” he swears by….

Some other notables from last night

The flashback from to the first season with the girl who sang “Lady Marmalade” more offensive than that song was Simon’s little pudgy face and extraordinarily poufy hair. And I loved that NPH (Neil Patrick Harris) noticed that her letters got smaller on her poster board and straight up told her you should have started over…..I love a mind for details!!

Why does Randy only compliment the “heavier” girls who can sing with “wow you can really blow”?? Insert all overweight whale jokes here……

The Turrets guy – bless his heart and good voice. I see a lot of uncomfortableness in our futures as this guy will progress the same way Mr. Scott did last year. I also enjoyed that NPH called out the “white elephant in the room” because no one was saying anything….

I liked that Dexter, the guy with the afro Mohawk, stated himself as the next Americans idol. And did any one catch NPH’s gaydar go into full throttle?

The Barney girl……I totally recognized her from at least 15 VHS tapes in our house at this time. Funny! The Barney song is my nigh nigh song for my son that we sing together every night and somehow the whips and chains she incorporated just spoiled any future bedtime routines with my son.

Pinky Tuscadero – where do you even find a hot pink and teal leotard and hot pink track shorts to boot now a days? Guaranteed those were hand me downs from her 39 year old mom.

Can someone please confirm that I am not crazy? I think I saw Posh spice guest hosting AGAIN in a preview clip – please say it isn’t so……That will be one day where I am okay with my DVR not working properly….ugh.

Munson out…..